Embodying Her

My Journey from “Fixing Myself” to Finally Feeling Free

When All the “Right” Things Still Didn’t Feel Right

I had done so much work...Mindset. Intentional Manifestation. Yoga. Meditation. Fitness. All the things society had told me would "fix" me.

I’d even manifested my soulmate relationship (though he had just become my ex), my dream retreat, and a thriving yoga community that I adored. And yet… I found myself in a place I never expected to be...

Deeply frustrated. Confused. Ashamed to admit it, even to myself… but somehow still feeling empty inside.

I’d sit in deep gratitude for my business, my clients, even for my breakup — I knew I was blessed.
But underneath that gratitude, there was this quiet ache I couldn’t ignore.

I was empowered — at least logically. I understood the Universe. I knew how to manifest.

But inside my body? I still felt small and unconfident. I was unable to speak my needs, hold my boundaries, or stand up for myself in relationships.

People crossed lines with me and I let them. Then I blamed myself, without realising it. Money also triggered deep shame.

And then came the phase where it felt like everything went backwards.

I was back in my hometown and back into old patterns — drinking too much, smoking, even panic attacks (something I’d never experienced before).

And the worst part? I felt like a bit of a fraud, to be honest.

On the outside: light, love, spiritual, graceful yoga teacher.
On the inside: shame, pain, and silence.
So many afternoons I’d crawl into bed and just cry.
I didn’t even know why. The pain just consumed me.

The Truth I Was Starting to See

Now, I can look back and see what was happening... I was trying so hard to be the “perfect” version of me. I was hiding the dark parts, rejecting the messy pieces, and abandoning myself in the name of looking like I had it all together.

I was living in resistance.

And in that resistance and pain, I was starting to uncover a deep truth — one I didn’t fully know yet:

✨ You can’t think your way into embodiment.
✨ You have to feel your way home to her.

Most people are afraid to really feel which is why they stay stuck. To fully feel it all is pretty radical in today's world of distractions. It's as empowering as it is fucking uncomfortable. Because when you really feel it all — the grief, the rage, the shame, the desire — you can’t hide anymore.

You can’t pretend you’re fine. You can’t ignore what your body’s been trying to say.

Are you prepared to be a little radical too?
To feel what most people run from? To stop numbing, overthinking, and fixing… And instead drop in?

Because guess what, feeling it all is the gateway to freedom. It’s the portal to power, clarity, and becoming her.

Trust me, this isn't a quick fix or a magical moment of transformation.
Embodiment runs so much deeper than that.

And that is what makes it so delicious, to be honest. ☺️

Breaking Free From Playing Small

I used to think I was “letting go,' and that staying quiet was the mature thing to do. That shrinking was a form of surrender.

But truthfully...

✨ I was afraid of being seen.
✨ I was terrified of being judged, misunderstood, rejected.
✨ I cared way too much about what others thought…
…because deep down, I was judging myself harder than anyone ever could.

I judged myself for the anxiety. For the money I hadn’t mastered and for my inability to speak my truth in relationships. I judged myself for the way I shrank — over and over again — and called it spiritual.

I’d silence my needs and call it “emotional responsibility,' and let people walk over me and call it “compassion.”

I didn’t know it yet, but this was the crack that let the truth start to seep in:
I couldn’t think my way into wholeness.
I couldn’t manifest my way into empowerment.

Because I was still playing small — in every direction.
In my hometown.
In my relationships.
In my friendships.
And worst of all… in my own body.

But even in the thick of it, I could feel it — a quiet knowing that something had to shift. That the next version of me required more than mindset work. She required me to feel it all. To break the rules I’d built around who I should be.

To expand.

The Rebellion: Booking a One-Way Ticket to Bali

So, I booked a one-way ticket to Bali — Not as a spiritual awakening…but as an act of rebellion against the version of me I had outgrown.

Because this was a dream I had pushed back for too long. And here’s something I’ve come to know about myself:

When I repress my desires, I become depressed.
When I shrink myself, I become anxious.
When I don’t speak my mind, I hold on to anger and frustration.
It builds… it simmers… and it eventually shows up as procrastination, hiding, and shame.

This wasn’t just a trip.... It was an energetic up-level. A shedding of the old.

A declaration: I’m fcking worthy of an extraordinary life.*

In the next part of this story, I’ll share the one single choice that catapulted me into HER energy — it was one of the most difficult decisions I have ever made...AND one of the most empowering.

Everything became so clear when I arrived in Australia and memories came flooding back.
I finally listened to the pull… leaned into a whole lot of rejection and judgment…
....and everything cracked wide open.

When Everything Fell Apart to Rebuild

I thought Bali would change me. And trust me — it did. But the biggest shift came when I landed in Australia.

There, in my friend’s spare room, jet-lagged and cracked open, I had a knowing that changed everything:

I wasn’t going back to the UK. 

Not now. Maybe not ever (permanently anyway).

This wasn’t the plan. My trip was only meant to be 3 months. I had a beautiful yoga teacher covering my classes. I’d promised I’d return and a lot of people had expectations. 

But the truth is — the decision to go back to England 3 years prior… It had never been fully mine.

Yes, I chose it. But if I’m honest? I had left Australia for a relationship — a partner who wanted to explore Europe and be close to my world. And I supported him, of course. I wanted to... and it was a great opportunity to be close to my family and friends again.

I made it work. In fact, on paper I was thriving...  After the pandemic, I almost effortlessly built a yoga business that lit my soul on fire. I was surrounded by community and love and success and beauty. I had wanted to manifest this so badly a year prior.

But I was also living in old patterns. I ended up back in my hometown... Playing it safe and denying my heart's true desires.

And when I sat in that quiet room in Australia, I felt something rise from the deepest part of me:

A remembering.
Of who I was before I compromised.
Of who I wanted to become.
Of what it felt like to be soft, expansive, free.

My body knew.

Even as my mind screamed:

“You’re going to disappoint everyone.”
“What about your business?”
“What will your auntie say?”
“You don’t even have a stable income.”

It wasn’t just a choice to stay in Australia. It was a decision to let go of everything I’d built. To disappoint people I loved and to grieve an identity that made me feel safe.

But I couldn’t abandon myself again. I had done that too many times already in my life, in numerous ways.

And some people did judge me. Some pulled away. 

But the beautiful thing is that others saw me more clearly than ever. And amazingly, these relationships became stronger and more deep and authentic.

Because when I made that decision… I started embodying a new energy. One that declared:

“I make decisions for me.”
“I can disappoint others and still be worthy of love.”
“I trust myself — even when it’s scary.”

It didn’t feel glamorous. In fact, it felt like everything was falling apart.

But sometimes things need to fall apart… So you can finally rebuild yourself from a place of truth.

And that’s when I began to embody her. Not the perfect version. Not the final destination.
But the real, raw, messy, and powerful woman I was always meant to be. 

(And this wasn't about being in Australia... I actually wanted to return to Bali. But it was the remembering that Australia stirred within me).

Born in the Mess: The Unapologetic Woman

The most unexpected part of all of this wasn’t just the decision to stay in Bali… or the letting go of my business, identity, friendships.

It was what was born in the mess.

The woman I became.

Not the polished version of me. Not the one who had it all figured out. But the unapologetic version.

The one who let herself be seen in all of it —

✨ The fear
✨ The instability
✨ The shame
✨ The chaos

And instead of hiding it... I started sharing it.

I started telling the truth. Even when it scared me and even when it risked rejection.

And yes — I was rejected.
Some people pulled away.
Some couldn’t hold my truth.
Some didn’t know how to love the version of me that no longer played small.

I started to lean into a weird enjoyment in the rejection and the pain. Because I knew I had stepped into the role of a powerful alchemist.

I knew that any resistance that came my way, anything that fell away, was an opportunity to play with life! To become even more powerful. To reach even deeper levels of satisfaction and joy.

And most importantly I had realised… I didn’t need everyone to understand me or my decisions. I didn't need to put myself in a box for other people's comfort any longer. I just needed to understand myself. To trust myself.

And what I saw?
Was a woman in a phase of deep growth and wild curiosity. A woman reclaiming her power — not in perfection, but in presence.

I started experimenting in my business.
In my relationships.
In my body.

I explored what it meant to feel free, to live without shame, to ask for what I wanted.

To be messy and human and still f*cking powerful.

Because power isn’t about control or certainty. It’s about truth.

It’s about standing in the chaos and saying:
“I choose me — even here.”

And this is when she was born:

The woman who no longer needed to justify her desires.
The woman who allowed the full spectrum.

Multifaceted and beautiful in all of it. The woman who stopped trying to do life “the right way” and instead did it her way.

🔥

That’s what I mean when I say I started to embody her. She is not some perfect future self... But the real, raw, radiant version of me — The one who had been there all along.

I wasn’t becoming someone else. I was finally allowing myself to be all of me.

And that’s what I want for you, too.

Because OMG the freedom that comes from this is something I cannot put into words. It's an unimaginable feeling when you allow yourself to be fully immersed in your human experience, to own all of it. You activate such an immense power. Your confidence and creativity skyrocket. Your relationships deepen. Your body responds energetically, physically.... you come ALIVE.

Like you are supposed to be!

Do you know what it really feels like?

To be so full alive in yourself that you don't need ANYTHING outside of you to change to feel absolutely phenomenal in your own skin and your own reality?

Realising I Was Already Her

One of the most unexpected moments on this journey?

It wasn’t just the shedding or the rebuilding.
It was the realisation that I had already become the woman I once dreamed about.

✨ The woman I used to admire from afar.
✨ The one I imagined as a child — radiant, wise, magnetic, alive.
✨ The woman I thought existed only in visions and “someday”s.

And yet… I hadn’t let myself feel it. I was still chasing.  I was still striving for the next thing and still gripping onto guilt that said: “Not yet. You haven’t earned it. You can’t enjoy it yet.”

But one day — not in a big dramatic moment, but quietly — I got bored of my not-good-enough story.

Bored of trying to please everyone else. Bored of playing small. Bored of waiting until everything was “perfect” to finally arrive in my life.

And so I let the guilt go. I decided to let myself be her and to sink into the sweetness of who I already was.

I realised:
You don’t become her by fixing yourself.
You become her by loving who you already are.
You embody her by choosing to live fully as yourself — now.

The Power of Showing Up As You

And to really understand how deep that goes, let me tell you something I’ve never forgotten:

There was a time in my life when I couldn’t leave the house without make-up. A time when I wouldn’t post a photo without a filter — and I genuinely hated how I looked in almost every picture.

And if I saw a “bad” one? It would ruin my whole night.
Wild, right? But so heartbreakingly real.

I remember actually crying in the toilets over a "bad" photo which I'd probably look at now and think how beautiful I was. I held onto that feeling for the rest of the evening which I was supposed to be enjoying with my friends.

I don't want any other woman to ever feel this way.

You see it wasn’t just about filters because they are not inherently good or bad. But it was about not feeling good enough. Not feeling safe to be seen as I was.

Now I can look at myself — bare-faced, unfiltered — and feel actual love.
Not performative self-love. Not curated confidence.... but real, deep, cellular love.

And that didn’t just “happen.” It came from every tiny moment I chose to come home to myself.
From the scary leaps I took. From reprogramming old beliefs so I could build a life that turns me on. From learning to embody the woman I already was underneath the fear.

It's the little things I do every single day. In the quiet moments when nobody is watching, nobody is cheering me on... those moments that nobody will ever know. This is when SHE is seen, loved, and allowed to come into the light as the main character of her own story.

What Embody Her Means to Me

Embody Her isn’t just a course.

It’s a space.

A space where you can:

✨ Remember your magic
✨ Reclaim your softness
✨ Own your messy brilliance
✨ Rewire the beliefs that once kept you small
✨ And return to the feminine power that’s always lived inside you

So you can live in the fullness of who you already are —
Magnetic. Radiant. Utterly obsessed with yourself and your life.
Not someday…
But now.

Your Invitation Home

If you’re ready to stop performing and start living as her — magnetic, radiant, and unapologetically alive — this is your invitation.

To come home to yourself. To embody your truth. To fall deeply in love with the woman you already are.

Because you’re not becoming someone else. You’re simply remembering.

And that is the most delicious journey of all.

♡ ↓ ♡

Thank you so much for witnessing me and my story 💋

My mission is to help as many women as possible come home to the feminine brilliance that lives within them. Together we can make our own lives more extraordinary and slowly but surely, the world a lighter and more peaceful place. I genuinely believe that is the power of the feminine... the power of Becoming Her. 

This is bigger than you. Bigger than me. 

But it's going to make your life soooo delicious, I cannot put it into words.

With so much love and deep gratitude,

Lucy x

 ♡ ↓ ♡

If you want to step into some of this energy, become the women of your dreams so you can create the world of your dreams... continue the journey below... 

➤ Option 1: Free Guide

Coming soon: “10 Steps to the Art of Being Her”
A soulful guide to help you drop the mask and activate the magnetic, embodied version of you — right now.

Coming Soon!

[JOIN MAILING LIST]

➤ Option 2: Embody Her Coaching Program

If you already feel the pull? ✨ Embody Her is open now.
This is your invitation to do the deepest, most liberating work of your life.

[CLICK HERE]

Final Reflection:

What would it look like to stop waiting… and simply be her now?
Can you give yourself permission — today — to live as the radiant, powerful, unfiltered version of you?